I get ready and take my time. I mosey from room to room. I put on a little makeup here. I brush my hair there. I make some tea. I wander to the closet. I watch the end of a Real Housewives reunion show. There's no rush.
Ben is the opposite. He waits until the last second and then races to get ready. He rushes from room to room. He picks out and puts on one outfit. One outfit!
It all sounds easy, right? Until...
He asks me if he looks good. Ninety percent of the time he does, but 10% of the time I say "no." "No" throws him into a tizzy, which I never understand. He doesn't plan his outfit the night before (like I do) or shop specifically for it (like I do). He picks it at the last second and then gets mad when it doesn't work. Fashion takes work, dude!
Tension escalates when we compete for the one sink in the bathroom. Ben wants to shave. I want to brush my teeth. We're at a standoff until Ben asks if I really need the bathroom.
Yes, I think, I do need it. That's why I'm standing there! But, I don't say that. Instead, I step away and grit my teeth as I relinquish my right to the sink.
Because I rework my routine to accompany his, I fall behind. Before I know it, Ben sits dressed and ready on the couch with a glass of bourbon and I gape at him in my bathrobe.
I then stress and bark orders like "close the blinds" and "take out the trash." Random and unimportant tasks that make me feel better since I am to blame (again) for us being fashionably late.
Finally, now five years into our marriage, we've been able to comprise and find a few solutions that seem to work.
Still, a bigger bathroom with a double vanity would be really, really nice.
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